Moving to a faraway place
Since moving last October, 250 miles away from my previous home county for the last 35 years, to Cornwall in the farthest South-West of England, and moving in to my new home on my birthday, it’s been an interesting six months of mixed emotions. I’m sure most people have been experiencing mixed emotions during the pandemic, and the following are a few of my thoughts and experiences, with my spiritual practice as my main support. #MixedEmotions
Lockdown #1 had ended whilst I was still living in Surrey. Restaurants had re-opened in the Summer, 2020, and I was seeing my friends openly again, so on the day I left with my son, who lives at home with me, we thought everything would stay open in Cornwall and I could start establishing a new life for myself.
We were up and away nice and early to meet my daughter Frances, who’s lived in Cornwall for the last six years having returned from a decade living in Sydney. We met up for my Birthday Breakfast at a lovely pub, and we had versions of a cooked Full English Breakfast. Frances handed me a gift and instructed me to “open this one first”. It contained a pretty “It’s My Birthday!” sash which I was had to: “Wear it all day!” So I dutifully obeyed and twelve hours’ later it had ripped and had been taped back together with not-so-attractive brown packing tape! #Happy and #Exhausted!
Emotions and Expectations
Plans to build a new life for myself by joining social groups, and yoga and meditation classes in my new hometown so I could start meeting like-minded people, and start spiritual groups myself, were all quickly put on hold in November 2020 when England was plunged into a Lockdown Tier system, and then into full Lockdown #2 immediately after Christmas. I was so annoyed at that point! I was just about to meet and have lunch with a group of women in my Soroptimist International Club when it was cancelled – I am not a fan of Lockdown as it has been so detrimental to so many friends’ physical and mental health. I was #Angry!
My hopes and plans of spending frequent quality time with Frances were dashed, and she discovered she was pregnant with her first baby only ten days after I moved, and so she was confined to quarters (spending a lot of time feeling nauseous!) and instead of shopping trips, business breakfasts and lunches and long walks together, we have been communicating in much the same way as if I was still living 250 miles away back in Surrey! But, I have to admit, with a few more meetings than when she lived in Australia for ten years! I was #Frustrated!
However, I started attending the nearest Unitarian Church to me, (in Plymouth which is 65 miles away), for their Sunday morning Zoom services and other evening meetings such as their lovely, contemplative Heart & Soul services and their more poetic and lively Congregational gatherings. I’ve really enjoyed these as I love poetry. But I knew at some point I would have to move on from my previous Unitarian church in Surrey, who were also Zooming their Sunday services, but it happened sooner than I thought because I was drawn to meet local Unitarians. I’m only sorry I’m an hour and a half’s drive from Plymouth! Cornwall is a long county, but I was #Happy yet #Undecided.
A Warm Welcome!
My 250 mile move has been eased by receiving a lovely warm welcome from both the Unitarians and from the St Austell & District Soroptimist International Club that I transferred to from my previous Surrey Club. But again, due to Lockdown, all meetings have been on Zoom and I’m really missing the company of the members in person, especially like-minded women to form working friendships with. #Lonely.
Luckily, I’ve been blessed with the friendship of a delightful 86 year old Soroptimist, Mary, who is a long-time Rambler/hiker and with her Bijon Frise, Monty, has been leading me down many country footpaths around the area. Mary is a retired Community Midwife and knows all the local routes, and there’s usually someone we bump in to that she knows on every walk! #Blessed!
Childhood Trauma
I was sent to boarding school when I was 7½ years old and often any sadness I feel goes back to my childhood experience and memories. But the mind-training course I’m studying, A Course in Miracles, explains the true cause of our sadness and any guilt is because subconsciously we think we’ve separated from our Source, which we haven’t. #Sadness.
Therefore, once this is realised, I will never feel lonely again, because we are One Mind. I’m also blessed with good friends in Surrey and beyond and a loving family – and all I have to do is “pick up the phone” to speak to them. Do you find that at low times we don’t feel like calling a friend? I do, but I find it really helps and we never know how much we might be cheering someone else up too! #Supported.
My Spiritual Practice
I’m blessed with having a strong spiritual practice of True Forgiveness which gives me peace of mind, but it doesn’t stop emotions coming up, such as sadness and loneliness, (particularly when things haven’t worked out as I’d planned for my move!), and I’ve felt lonely despite having my family close by – one can’t help one’s emotions until we’ve completely healed our minds. I’ve even felt angry recently, which is quite a new emotion for me! #Blessed. #Sadness. #Loneliness. #Anger!
I’ve learnt, however, to acknowledge my emotions and try to understand what the causes are, beneath the immediate worldly reasons. Usually, the immediate reason is signalling a deeper meaning in our subconscious or from a past life, and once I’ve worked out what they are, I can then work on forgiving and releasing the emotion – ie healing the causes. #Understanding. #Release. #Healing.
So, although my emotions have been more pronounced since moving to Cornwall, (Lockdown in Surrey wasn’t too bad because I knew the area and had good friends locally), I am blessed with being able to let them go and let God in! Thank goodness for my teachers – Margaret, Maitreya, Jesus and his channel, Helen Schucman, and all my wonderful teachers including my children. #Blessed! #Happy! #Grateful!
We are never truly alone.
With love, as ever
Jacquie